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Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi

A networking book that delivers a knockout punch of value. Networking and meeting new people is a weakness of mine so you can imagine I found this book incredibly useful. I’d say it’s on a par with Dale Carnegie’s classic – How to Win Friends and Influence People.

If you’re like me and would like to improve your networking arsenal, take a look at what I wrote in my journal;

  • Until you become as willing to ask for help as you are to give it, you are only working half the equation.
  • The summary of networking is generosity.
  • It’s easier to get ahead in the world when those below you are happy to help you get ahead, rather than hoping for your downfall.
  • A goal is a dream with a deadline.
  • There is genius, even kindness in being bold.
  • Don’t network – make friends.
  • “Spectacular achievement is always preceded by spectacular preparation” – Robert H.Schuller.
  • Secretaries and assistants are gatekeepers to the bosses and CEOs. They must like you/become your friend if you are to get the most from the relationship with their boss.
  • Your network is like a muscle, the more you work it the bigger it gets.
  • Give yourself between 12 and 24 hours after meeting someone to follow up. A simple “it was a pleasure meeting you and discussing…” Then drop another email in a month – use phone calendar for reminder.
  • When you enter a room full of people, step to the right. See who is there. You want the other people to see you.
  • Learn to touch people. Shake hands or the authors personal favourite is touching a persons elbow.
  • Express your desire to meet again when closing the conversation e.g. “It’s been really interesting chatting with you, let’s do this again.”
  • Wisdom from Dale Carnegie;
  1. “Become genuinely interested in other people”
  2. “Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves”
  3. “Let the other person do a great deal of the talking”
  4. “Smile”
  5. “Talk in terms of the other person’s interests”
  6. “Give honest and sincere appreciation”
  • When you land in a new country message people “Hi Jan, Just landed in New York and it made me think of you. No time to meet this trip, but just wanted to touch base.”
  • Invite people round for dinner – no need to cook. Starter – crisps/chips and salsa. Main – Cooked chicken and salad wraps. Dessert – cookies and ice cream.
  • 8 Steps of dinner parties;
  1. Have a theme – meatloaf recipes, black tie, vegan food, organic, music
  2. Plan an invite people through email, social media
  3. Don’t spend time in the kitchen – pre-cook
  4. Create an atmosphere – music, candles, flowers, young child as waiter
  5. Keep it informal – jeans and jacket
  6. Don’t seat couples together – can use placeholders (name tags on seats)
  7. Relax
  8. Host virtual after party – send thanks for coming with pics of event.
  • People don’t only hire people they like, they hire people who can make their company better.

 

3d

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A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle

A very deep book that requires some thinking time to properly grasp the meanings and truly understand the author. If you intend to read it ensure to have a pen and paper at the ready, here’s what I wrote;

  • This book is about you. It will change your state of consciousness or it will be meaningless. It can only awaken those who are ready.
  • (reading this book made me realise there’s so much I don’t understand)
  • The only difference between a crazy person and a sane person is they talk out loud.
  • The consciousness that says “I am thinking” is not the consciousness that thinks e.g. if you think about a dog, what it looks like, sounds etc the part of the mind that knows you are thinking about the dog is a different dimension of consciousness. If there was nothing but thought in you, you wouldn’t know you was thinking. You would be like a dreamer who doesn’t know they are dreaming.
  • Ego is identification with form
  • All think is required to become free of ego is be aware of it. Awareness and ego are incompatible.
  • The underlying emotion that governs all the activity of the ego is fear.
  • The most the ego can ever do to cover up the fear temporarily with an intimate relationship, new procession or winning at something.
  • “How can I be myself?” is in fact the wrong question. It implies you have to do something to be yourself.
  • Who are you? Consciousness that has become conscious of it’s self.
  • You may not want to know yourself becasue you are afraid of what you may find out. Many people have a secret fear that they are bad.
  • When you drink alcohol, you may feel relaxed, more carefree and perhaps more alive for a while because you are less burdened by your mind, you can glimpse the joy of being. Perhaps this is the reason alcohol is also called spirit.

3d

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Super Brain by Deepak Chopra and Rudolph E. Tanzi

Another super book packed full of value, this one was recommended by Daniela Lopez! Here’s what I wrote down, hope you find value;

  • As we ag the brain produces new nerve cells, this can be stimulated by physical exercise, mentally stimulating activities (such as reading) and social connectedness.

How to expand your consciousness;

  • Put a higher value on being awake, alert aware.
  • Resist conformity. Don’t think and act like everyone else
  • Value yourself. Don’t wait for the approval of others to validate you. Instead of desiring external validation strive to help others.
  • Question your own core beliefs
  • Keep faith that inner growth is an ending process.

 

How to transform your perceptions;

  • Be sceptical of fixed reactions, both yours and anyone else.
  • Confront old conditioning – it leads to unconscious behaviour.
  • Be aware of your emotions and where they come from.
  • Examine your core beliefs, hold them up to the light, and discard beliefs that make you stuck.
  • Practice empathy so that you can experience the world through someone else’s eyes.

 

 

  • Awareness is noticing you are feeling an emotion e.g. “I am angry/sad” etc
  • Self-awareness is asking “What do I think about being angry? What does it mean?”
  • Loosing Weight – An imbalance in the brain circuitry results when the areas for impulsive behaviour are strengthened while areas for rational decision making have been weakened. The repetition of negative patterns also harms decision making because when you blame yourself or feel like a failure, lower parts of your brain are once again over-riding your cerebral cortex. Balance is restored when you make a self-enhancing decision – good food or not eating due to an emotional fix.
  • No one speaks of the wisdom of the sex drive, but our instinctively driven emotions are definitely wise. They stand for the kind of awareness that leads us to be happy.
  • Responding to any situation requires understanding, reacting doesn’t.

 

Good suffering you don’t need;

  • Taking the blame for someone else’s mistakes.
  • Covering up abuse, physical or mental.
  • Allowing yourself to be belittled in public.
  • Letting your children disrespect you.
  • Not speaking your truth.
  • Denying yourself sexual fulfilment.
  • Pretending to love.
  • Working at a job you hate.

 

  • Rigidity leads to ritualistic behaviour (rigidity = rigid people). Taken to an extreme, rigidity leads to severe judgements against others enforcing rules with harsh punishments.
  • Fear becomes worse when you are seriously ill, yet dealing with anxiety is far more effective if you attend to it years before you ever get sick. The mind-body connection has to be strengthened before trouble arises.
  • Meditation can increase the enzyme that replenishes telomeres – the anti-ageing chemical. Mediation keeps us young.
  • Drink red wine other alcohol for anti-ageing.
  •  Studies have shown that loosing a spouse suddenly leads to isolation, depression, higher risk for disease and shortened life span. But if you have a social network beyond your spouse you have a cushion against these baleful consequences.
  • Falling asleep during meditation is not failure, your brain is taking what it needs most.
  • We aren’t machines that learned to think, we are thoughts that learned how to make machines.

You can get my book Secrets to Personal Development for FREE. Click the link below, enter your email address and I’ll send a copy over now.

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Awaken The Giant Within by Tony Robbins

There’s lots of value packed into this book, I’m going to keep this post as short as possible so I will jump right in;

  • Know that it is your decisions and not your conditions that determine your destiny.
  • It is not the events of our lives that shape us, but our beliefs as to what these events mean.
  • All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in beliefs. The most effective way is to get the brain to associate massive pain to the old belief.
  • If we are to change quickly we must hold two beliefs;
  1. that we can change now
  2. we’re responsible for our own change, not anyone else.
  • To create long-term change we must have 3 beliefs on responsibility;
  1. first we must believe “Something must change” not should or could, but must.
  2. we must believe “I must change it”
  3. “I can change it”
  • Link pleasure to any behaviour you want to repeat
  • The key to success is to create patterns of movement that create confidence, a sense of strength, flexibility, a sense of personal power and fun.
  • Getting old is not a matter of age, it’s a lack of movement. And the ultimate lack of movement is death.
  • Successful people asked better questions, and as a result got better answers.
  • Change your state by asking the following 5 questions;
  1. What is great about this problem?
  2. What is not perfect yet?
  3. What am I willing to do to make it the way I want it?
  4. What am no longer willing to do in order to make it the way I want it?
  5. How can I enjoy the process?
  • The words you habitually choose also affect how you communicate with yourself and therefore what you experience.
  • Words shape our beliefs and impact our actions.
  • By adopting some else habitual vocabulary, you begin to adopt their emotional patterns.
  • A whole set of rules, ideas and preconceived emotions accompany any metaphor you adopt.
  • The emotions you once thought of as negative are merely calls to action.
  • 6 steps to emotional mastery;
  1. Identify what you’re really feeling
  2. Acknowledge and appreciate your emotions knowing they support you.
  3. Get  curious about the message the emotion is offering you.
  4. Get confident
  5. Get certain you can handle this not only today, but in the future as well.
  6. Get excited and take action.
  • Sometimes we need to trust that our disappointments may truly be opportunities in disguise.
  • As long as we structure our lives in a way where our happiness is dependent upon something we cannot control, then we will experience pain.
  • Procrastination – instead of saying “I should start this project” say, ” I must finish this project”. Change your shoulds to musts.
  • “A man’s mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to it’s original dimensions” – Oliver Wendel Holmes
  • Loss is imaginary. Nothing ever disappears in the universe, it only changes form.
  • The key to wealth is to be more valuable.
  • Most important way to expand your income is to devise a way to consistently add value to peoples lives, and you will prosper.
  • The true purpose of any cooperation is to create products and services that increase the quality of life for all the customers they serve.
  • Donating/giving money away convinces your brain you have more money than you need/an abundance of money.

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Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker

Another great book and another on the subject of wealth. I’m probably reading money books at the minute because I have no income. This is a classic, it’s the first time I’ve read Secrets of the Millionaire Mind however I have listen the audio-book and that is equally as good!.

Here’s the value I found, hope you find it useful;

  • Thoughts lead to feelings; Feelings lead to actions; Actions lead to results
  • We are conditioned in 3 primary ways;
  1. Verbal programming – what did you hear when you were growing up?
  2. Modelling – What did you see when you were young?
  3. Specific incidents – What did you experience when you were young?
  • When the subconscious mind must choose between deeply rooted emotions and logic. Emotions will almost always win.
  • Rich people believe “I create my life”. Poor people believe “life happens to me”.
  • Rich people play the money game to win. Poor people play the money game to not loose.
  • Rich people are committed to being rich. Poor people want to be rich.
  • Rich people think big. Poor people think small.
  • Rich people focus on opportunities. Poor people focus on obstacles.
  • Rich people admire other rich and successful people. Poor people resent rich and successful people.
  • Rich people associate with positive, successful people. Poor people associate with negative, unsuccessful people.
  • Rich people are willing to promote themselves and their value. Poor people think negatively about selling and promoting.
  • Rich people are bigger than their problems. Poor people are smaller than their problems.
  • Rich people are excellent receivers. Poor people are poor receivers.

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The Millionaire Fastlane by M J DeMarco

One of the best books on money, wealth and being rich. If you want to increase your income and change your lifestyle The Millionaire Fastlane is a MUST READ!

Here’s what I took from it;

  • The Process creates events that others see as luck. Luck is not an event but the after effect of process. (An event is leaving your job, buying a new car, selling 1 million units of your product – the process is all the work, blood sweat and tears that happens before)
  • 3 Beliefs keep people trapped from becoming wealthy;
    • Luck is needed for wealth
    • Wealth is an event
    • Others can give wealth to you
  • Responsibility: it was my fault my purse got stolen. Accountability: In the future; I will take precautions so it doesn’t happen again.
  • Wealth is best experienced when you’re young, vibrant and able. NOT in the twilight of your life.
  • 5 Fastlane business systems that generate passive income. Each are graded, the higher the grade the higher its potential;
    1. Rental – Grade (A) – Real Estate, leases, royalty payments, licensing e.g. Music
    2. Computer/Software – Grade (A-) – computer software, websites, iPhone app/game
    3. Content – Grade (B) – books, magazines, blogs, social networks
    4. Distribution – Grade (B) – Amazon is a distribution system so are all network marketing companies, franchising
    5. Human Resources – Grade (C) – a manager of a coffee shop is a human resource system – they reduce your hours, but requires you to handle a person rather than a computer/system. Most expensive to manage and implement.
  • Lending money is 99.5% passive lenders $10 million at 5% interest, earns you $41,666 every month.
  • The rich use the interest as cash – liquid asset – so they don’t need to touch their capital.
  • Serve millions to make millions. Think big to earn big.
  • Lifestyle choices will make you a millionaire.
  • The leading cause of poorness is porr choices.
  • Success is hundreds of choices that form process. Process forms lifestyle.
  • “Ridicule is the tribute paid to the genius by the mediocrities” – Oscar Wilde.
  • Extraordinary wealth will require you to have extra ordinary beliefs.
  • Value your time poorly and you will be poor.
  • Show me someone who spends hours playing online mafia wars or FarmVille and I’ll show you someone who probably isn’t very successful.
  • When life sucks, escapes are sought.
  • The swear of Success is Failure.
  • Starting a business is a process not an event.
  • “At first people refuse to believe that a strange new thing can be done, then they begin to hope it can be done, then they see it can be done. Then it is done, and all the world wonders why it was not done centuries ago” – Frances Hodgson Burnette.
  • The owner of an idea is not he who imagines it, but he who executes it.
  • Ideas are just events – the process is what matters.
  • “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody” – Bill Crosby

“Everyone has an invisible sign hanging from their neck saying ‘Make me feel important’. Never forget that message when working with people” – Mary Kate Ash

You can get my book Secrets to Personal Development for FREE. Click the link below, enter your email address and I’ll send a copy over now.

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YouTube Black Book by Christopher Sharpe

This is a quick, simple and easy-to-read ebook. It gets straight to the point and that’s the main reason I gave it 4 stars on Amazon  and Goodreads. Reading time is up to 2 hours.

Here’s what I journaled;

  • Three types of video get shared; 1) identity – something we can relate to. 2) Emotional Gift – causes an emotional response. 3) Social role of information – to prove a point/tell the world this is my belief.
  • Video titles used to grab attention.
  • Description – only the first 3 lines are visible before clicking to watch.
  • Aim for 7-10 tags
  • Use speechpad.com or fiverr.com for captions.
  • MemberMaze is a word press plugin for offering monthly member ship.

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Give This A Listen…Please!

In May I wrote a post titled  When You Can’t Read – Listen!  with the message being when it’s inconvenient or impossible to read, listen to audio books instead.

Today, I have another audio book to add to your collection. Average Joe’s Secrets to Personal Development just hit audible’s shelves! What’s more it’s at a special discounted price for a few days only. And even better than that, if you’re new to audible you can listen for free by signing up to there 30 day trial.

Here’s the link , hope you enjoy – http://adbl.co/28O80yX

Joe

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Last Chance To Grab A Copy of My Amazon Best Selling ebook

Average Joe’s Secrets to Personal Development is free on Amazon.com until the end of the day. Get my 5 simple and straightforward principles to personal growth in an easy to read eBook. Grab your FREE copy here – http://geni.us/41fD

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